allessandro is a dangerous street

i like to go on night time bike rides, just because less cars and less chance of getting run over. also because its cooler at night/late afternoon.

so this weekend, sunday night, i was riding my bike by myself.


and i decided to challenge myself and instead go on a cruiser type ride, go up a slight hill, that slight hill being allesandro. and when i was riding up i thought i saw a dog come down from the hill, but then. the closer i got...


i realized it was an overly friendly coyote, and as i passed it (i was on the right side, he was on the left) he ran over to me, and then started gaining on me. this is when "freak out mode" happened in my body.
so naturally i pedaled my ass off up the hill (twas tiring) at full pedal speed while this crazy coyote was chasing me and it went on for about 1 - 2 minutes of intense escaping bike tactics. i felt like i was racing lance armstrong or something, tour de france style.

finally after being super tired and pedaling i looked back (for the 8th time) to see if the coyote was still on my ass, and he had just stopped in the midde of the street and was staring at me. like helpless little starving coyote expecting me to cut off my arm and toss it to him.

after i got to the top of the hill and paused to catch my breath i raced down and saw no trace of the bastard. instead i saw a weird gay dude getting out his car with his shirt off covered in sweat zipping up his pants as if he just got a blowjob from the other weird dude sitting in his passenger seat. his head looked at me as i went down like one of those weird robotic surveillance cameras, like just turned at a perfect rotation. he was a weirdo.

lesson learned.

just ride my bike on flat streets near skunks drunk bums as opposed to hilly areas with secluded gay dudes and their prostitutes and starving coyotes. On a similar note, whilst riding in the silverlake hills with my friend we spied another guy receiving fellatio in his suv, parked on a dirt road. He quickly sped off when he saw us riding by. Peopel should come up with better places to fool around. its like dont even try anymore (kind of like that one time i saw+plus heard a girl on her kness inside a stall in a dirty hollywood bar bathroom) its no wonder i like hand sanitizer and anti-bacterial soap.